FYI: People Don’t Like When You Abbreviate Texts
If you get a text that says “wyd”—translation: “what are you doing?”—there’s a good chance there’s one thing you’re crossing off that list: replying to the message.
According to a study published Nov. 14 in the Journal of Experimental Psychology: General, 99.3% of texters regularly use abbreviations that, in theory, could save precious typing time, like opting for “hru?” instead of asking someone how they are, or shortening “really” to “rly.” Study author David Fang, a doctoral student in behavioral marketing at Stanford University, wondered if this habit enhanced or diminished digital communication. He’s always made it a point to text in complete sentences, because he worried that otherwise, the people on the receiving end of his messages would think he was slacking off. But he wasn’t sure if his intuition was correct, so he decided to test it.
It turns out that Fang was on to something. Abbreviations in text messages register as insincere to recipients, who then send shorter and fewer responses (if they bother to reply at all). “I was surprised at how significant the negative results were,” he says. “Abbreviations are quite subtle—they’re not really a blatant transgression. But people can see you’re taking a shortcut and putting less effort into typing, and that triggers a negative perception.”
All age groups hate text abbreviations
Fang and his co-authors started off with open minds: Abbreviated messages could indicate a lack of effort that might rub people the wrong way, sure, but they might come across as laid-back and approachable, promoting a greater sense of closeness.
To determine which instinct was correct, the researchers conducted eight experiments with data from thousands of people. They analyzed anonymous Tinder and Discord conversations, which led to the conclusion that people were less likely to exchange contact information with or reply to abbreviation-lovers. They also asked participants to rate text conversations—including texts that they had received from other people in real life. People described messages with abbreviations as being less sincere than those without any, and indicated that they weren’t inclined to reply.
Read More: How to Break 8 Toxic Communication Habits
Interestingly, the effects held true among different age groups—from savvy Gen-Z texters to those who probably didn’t know what half of the abbreviations meant. Though some might think of abbreviations as youthful or hip, young people don’t actually like them. “Younger people dislike abbreviations just as much as older people,” Fang says. “It’s equally negative.”
Why the harsh reaction? It’s likely due to something called social exchange theory: the common belief that a relationship hinges on its cost-benefit balance. How much effort one person puts in, the thinking goes, influences the other person’s reciprocal effort. So if you feel like someone isn’t putting much into a texting relationship—which inherently has a back-and-forth, give-and-take nature—you’ll likely adjust your communication accordingly.
Why it matters
If you love abbreviations—bc, IDK, they’re cool or convenient—you don’t have to shun them entirely based on these results, Fang says. Rather, he suggests thinking carefully about who’s on the receiving end of your messages. Say you’re trying to woo a potential date: In the Tinder analysis, a 1 percentage point increase in “netspeak” (which includes common abbreviations and acronyms) was associated with a 7 percentage point decrease in average conversation length. “When two people meet on Tinder, and they’re pretty much strangers, you could imagine that if the conversations are shorter, maybe people aren’t building as strong of a connection,” Fang says. “One of the ramifications could be that relationships just will not take off as much.”
Even people in your inner circle might not appreciate your informal texts. In one of Fang’s experiments, people were asked to imagine being in a text conversation with someone they were close to or distant from. They found that even when two people were close, abbreviations indicated insincerity. Over time, that could take a toll on relationships. As past research has concluded, people value the quality of their conversations—and they want text-message exchanges to convey thoughtfulness and reflect the strong connection they’ve cultivated. “Your existing relationships might not be nurtured as much if you’re a bad texter,” Fang says.
Read More: Is Venting Healthy, Or Does It Make Things Worse?
But let’s say, on the other hand, that you’re texting with a delivery driver who’s bringing the dinner you ordered to your apartment. If you want to fire off a “WYA”—”where are you at?”—you’re probably not going to offend anyone. “You don’t imagine establishing a long-term relationship with that person,” Fang says. “But if you do—if you’re talking to a coworker or a potential date—you might want to be more cognizant of the types of texts you send, and use less abbreviations.”
The ‘effortless’ text that wasn’t
Michelle Drouin, a psychology professor at Indiana University-Purdue University Fort Wayne and author of Out of Touch: How to Survive an Intimacy Famine, isn’t surprised by the study’s results (which she was not involved with). She points out that predictive texting has become so advanced that spelling out a full word or phrase barely requires any additional effort compared to opting for the abbreviation. “It takes some effort to be this effortless,” she says. “It implies a kind of laissez-faire attitude, or an intentional cutting of the letters. It’s no longer a time-saving technique.” If you try to type “rly,” for example, your phone will probably auto-correct it to “really,” at least until it learns you prefer the shortened version.
Read More: 9 Things You Should Do for Your Brain Health Every Day, According to Neurologists
The research didn’t examine people’s motivations for using abbreviations, but Drouin thinks that those who intentionally chop letters off their words are trying to “put off a vibe of, ‘I don’t care,’” she says. “If they want to portray to the other person that they’re not taking this very seriously, and [the conversation] feels casual to them, then these abbreviations might be well-suited.”
Otherwise, if you’re trying to make a good impression, steer clear. People we don’t yet know are constantly making snap judgments about us, and the words we use play an important role in what kind of impression we make. Given that texting is a mainstay of modern-day relationships—the “social currency of the ages,” as Drouin calls it—it can be helpful to reflect on your texting habits and whether you’re presenting yourself well. “If you have your texting game on point, I think you can really foster and maintain a lot of goodwill with your social connections,” she says. “People should really pay attention to the way in which they say things and the frequency with which they say the things they want to say. It matters.” YW for the tip.